Saturday, August 8, 2009

Language (ironically use the word "blah" a lot in this post)

This is probably going to be very rough draft like. I just don't even know where to start. Shall I start at the beginning of the idea...or should I add a little back story. And if so, how much?

Let's start it at December of 2003. I was at the third Lord of the Rings movie, looking as though I was crying my eyes out. I wasn't, though, just had one of the worst sinus colds ever. I figured, I'm miserable anyway, might as well see a 4 hour long movie too. Samwise was being pretty inspirational, though, so I'm sure someone might have cried their eyes out.

Anyway, as it usually goes, I was doing some thinking during the movie, and decided that my new year's resolution would be that I would not (how to put this) be looking for a husband in 2004. Not that I had been a serial dater in the past or anything like that. But I was the type that had at least two big lists of what I wanted in a man that would be my husband, and I was holding to it pretty strongly. I was also sick of being friends with boys and wondering if they were "the one."

So I decided to take a year off from that thinking. If someone wanted to date me that year, they would just have to wait until 2005. I was not going to look at my husband lists, and I was not going to be interested in dating any boys. I was going to learn how to be content on my own, because, I figured, if I was not content while I wasn't dating anyone, I certainly wouldn't suddenly be content if I was dating someone. I decided it would be healthy for me, and in hindsight, I think it was healthy for whoever I would marry (if that ever would happen). I wanted to be content in my singleness.

In this resolution, I also decided to make some goals for being independent. I decided that I was going to try eating out alone, and try going to movies by myself. Eating out while you're by yourself wouldn't be so bad, except I feel like everyone feels a little bit sorry for you.

Host: How many?
Me: One
Host; Right this way

Ok. So it wasn't really what the host said so much as it was the look on her face while she was saying it. That, and the fact that she and the waitress kept coming back over to check to see if I needed anything. If you can look past that, I guess I can say that eating by yourself gets you really good customer service.

Going to the movies by myself, however, I actually really loved. There is something freeing about sitting there all by yourself, laughing out loud with the other people in the theater.

Anyway, I say all this to lead up to the point that it was in 2004, in a restaurant by myself, that I read the book about the 5 Love Languages. I found it to be pretty interesting; something I think about a lot still to this day. I always try to figure out what other people's love language is.

My love language is Quality Time (a close second is Words of Affirmation...leave some comments, people!).

I guess I could've started this post out with, "Back in 2004, I read this book about the 5 Love Languages." Ah well. Told you it was going to be very rough drafty. I look back on 2004 being such a great year. The friends and memories I had/made in 2004 are some of the ones that I still cherish today. Best new year's resolution ever*. Anyway.

Fast forward 5 or so years. I'm laying awake in bed thinking about how lately I've been feeling rather "blah" toward God (for lack of a better word). And I wondered if God maybe felt "blah" about me too? My brain instantly generated a bunch of verses that reminded me that God doesn't feel blah about me...but I couldn't get over why I felt like God was, how do I say this, annoyed with me (just because someone feels something doesn't mean that it's true). And annoyed might not be the right word either. Maybe blah is.

Anyway, then it dawned on me that my love language is quality time. How much quality time had God and I been spending at that point? Maybe if I would just intentionally take more time to spend with God, quality time, I wouldn't have to lay in bed at night wondering why I feel so spiritually blah.

Then, I started wondering if all of the love languages play into our relationship with God (this is also where I could've started this post).

Let's review what the love languages are:

Words of Affirmation
Quality Time
Receiving gifts
Acts of Service
Physical Touch

Now, I don't want to dig too deeply into this for a few reasons:
1. The love languages are not my original idea, so I don't want to add too much to someone else's idea.
2. I don't want to take something out of context and make it mean what I want it to, beyond what the author intended.
3. I've already typed like 3 posts worth of stuff. Who knows if anyone has made it this far?

Anyway, so if someone's love language was Words of Affirmation, they would know God's love most through some encouraging words from the Bible.

Is someone's love language was Quality Time, they would most experience God's love through intentional time taken out of their day to devote to spending time with God (this can probably look many different ways).

If Receiving Gifts...maybe someone would say that the gift of salvation, or the gift of a beautiful sunrise, or any other gift that God gives is a certain reminder of his love.

If Acts of Service....perhaps this person recognizes God's love most when serving others as Jesus did. Perhaps the biggest act of love for them is Christ dying on the cross?

If Physical Touch...maybe being out in nature/creation, physically experiencing God's handiwork is the best way to know God's love, if indeed this is your love language.

I guess maybe the question should be, "How do you know that God loves you?"

I guess this is also where I could've started this post, but instead, it is where I will end it.

*It was about March or so of 2005 that I was feeling pretty content with my singleness. Content with life, I should say. God has a pretty good sense of humor though, because in April of 2005, Steve and I started dating, and in June of 2006 we were married. I love marriage, and I think being so good at being single before that has helped a lot....but that's for another post altogether.

Mad props to Amy Hoffsommer, our wedding photog.


cutewatergirl said...

1st: I wanted to let you know I made it to the end of this absurdly long post and am happy I pressed forward:)

2nd: I too enjoy taking myself to the movies and find it just as fun as going with someone else or a group of people.

3rd: I LOVED the book five love languages and very much so enjoyed your thoughts on how the languages can be applied to our love of God and how we perceive/experience his love toward us.

My main one is acts of service with quality time coming in 2nd. After some thought on the subject of how this ties into my views of God's love, there is certainly a correlation, at least in my case. When I am serving others, I find myself more appreciative of his love for me, and like you said his greatest act of love for us was to serve as our replacement on the cross. Also, when I have not spent quality time in his word and/or worshiping his name, I find myself feeling the further from him then when I spend quality (not to be confused with quantity) time with him.

ashpad said...

1. i have not kept up on your blog this summer.
2. i have not kept up on my blog this summer.
3. at least that shows that i'm not a crazy stalker. if you were ever wondering, now you have your answer.
4. however, reading this latest post, i've realized i still enjoy your thought process.
5. it's bed time.

Laura said...

thanks for the comments! :)

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